How to Say “No” and Mean It!

angry-womanThat two letter word is very powerful. When you use it, you find a freedom you never knew existed. When you fail to use it, you will be taken advantage of repeatedly.

But why do we have such a hard time saying “no”?

Part of it is due to our desire to be liked. Many of us are people-pleasers and we will do just about anything to get people to like us. But once you’ve agreed to do something, that fleeting pleasure is past, and you are now stuck doing something that could possibly take hours, even days of your life to accomplish, and the person you agreed to help doesn’t like you any more than they did when you first met.

Or, you might be afraid of appearing rude. Many of us were taught that when someone senior to us asked us to do something, we were honor-bound to agree. It was very rude to refuse. It could be seen as a sign of rejection.

And the worst reason of all is being afraid of losing out on an experience or an opportunity. People in corporate America find themselves in that position quite often. They might enjoy the team they’re working on, but if they are tapped on the shoulder to go work on another team, or even to move to a different division a state or two away, being afraid to say no can uproot an entire family. All because they were afraid they wouldn’t be chosen for opportunities in the future.

Let’s look at a different way to approach these scenarios. Rather than looking at saying no as rejecting or refusing something, consider instead what you really and truly want to say yes to. We all have our needs, our plans for the future, our own interests and passions. When we agree to do something, it really has to answer the question, “Will it help me or hurt me?” If it will hurt you in some way, you really do need to refuse. If it will help you and you want or need to do it, then by all means, agree to do it.

The next time you find yourself in a position to say yes or no, try this; don’t commit right away. Say, “I don’t think that will work for me right now.” You can always think about it and change your mind, but resist giving reasons for saying no, and then stand firm until you have had time to reflect on a very considered answer.

Once you have done this several times, it will begin to be a healthier habit than simply agreeing to do something to be liked or agreeable. Making this one change in your life will give you more time for the things you really want to do.

Angry Woman by Vera Kratochvil

The Benefits of Yoga

yoga-exercise-14020804086s6Yoga is a body movement technique that has been around since the ancient times. It is made up of different unique aspects such as synchronization disciplines of mind, soul and body, ancient teachings and the power of observation. Due to the many health benefits that are associated with the practice, this has driven many medical experts to recommend it as a conventional cure to many disorders that affect the human body. From yoga meditation to posture executions, all have been found to be extremely helpful to the human anatomy. Here are life-changing benefits of Yoga that can transform your life forever.

You have probably heard that there are specific exercises that can help you lose weight without a lot of effort. One such exercise that will make losing weight both fun and pleasurable is yoga. In fact not only will you be achieving all your weigh related goals, but also you will be getting a more flexible body.

Improved state of mind coupled with good health is certainly what you will get when you start taking regular Yoga classes at your local gym. Definitely the benefits are not confined to the bodily enhancement alone, but they can as well be discerned at a spiritual and mental level. Most importantly, your life will undergo a total change when you let this art guide you into life’s uncertain journeys.

In modern day living, if there is one thing that you cannot escape easily, then it must be stress. Stress affects millions of people each year and failing to contain this negative energy has proven disastrous in many people’s lives. However, taking a few Yoga lessons can help reduce or discharge stress out of your life.

You probably have heard or read that scenic sites are considered good stress-busters since they provide a sense of peace to the person. Nevertheless, did you know that you can also discover true peace within you if you look for it? Certainly you can and Yoga happens to be the only practice that allows you to experience this beautiful peace. By including Yoga as an important part of your life, you will be able to find true peace that will further help in promoting your life. These are some of the best known benefits of Yoga that can leave a profound effect on your mind, soul and body.

Yoga Exercise by Anna Langova

Acupuncture and RLS

Restless Legs Syndrome (RLS) can be characterized by pulling, creeping or other unpleasant sensations in the legs signaling the overwhelming, and sometimes uncontrollable, urge to move your legs. As many as 10% of the population in the US suffers from RLS, but many health care practitioners have little advice on how to improve the problem.

Here, Curry explains some basic causes of RLS and how acupuncture can help treat the cause of Restless Legs Syndrome.

The following from excerpt  Oriental Medicine and You describes a common cause in many RLS cases:

“There are many reasons one could experience restless leg syndrome, however what follows are the basic mechanics.  The “yin” of the body is cool, moist, and nourishing (an example of yin in the body would be the amniotic fluid around a baby).  The “yang” of the body is hot, moving, and invigorating (an example of yang in the body would be a woman experiencing hot flashes where the yang goes “awry”).  A deficiency of yin will cause the yang to “rise” at the most yin time of the day (night), causing the muscles to become active when they are supposed to be relaxed and immobile. 

 As a person goes through life, there are a variety of stressors that can cause a breakdown in kidney/adrenal function.  As that function begins to slip, the yin of the kidney/adrenal system becomes depleted, which causes the yang to become overactive, stimulating the muscles of the legs.”

Banish Negative Body Images

6656064851_9859152d8c_zAsk anyone and they will tell you that they have a body confidence issue. It might be their hair, their beard, their arms, hands, waist, butt, legs, whatever. Very few people in the world are content with the way their body looks.

You may be a “work in progress” and you’ve been working on it for a good long time. Does this mean you have to wait to love your body until it’s perfect? If you do, you’re missing out. Researchers have interviewed women who have met their super-slim goals and when asked about how they felt about their bodies, their responses were overwhelmingly negative.

What gives?

The key is to love yourself as you are. If you can love your body now, today, you will be more willing to love your body when it is closer to your image of perfect. But if you hate your body now, even when in the eyes of other people it looks perfect, you will likely still have a very negative body image.

So in order to set yourself up for satisfaction in the future, you need to embrace who you are today and love your body with all its wrinkles and dimples.

Women are more likely than men to have a negative body image and this can lead to a lot of problems. Recent research has established that having a negative body image can have as serious an impact on a woman’s health, both mental and physical, as actually being obese.

Add to that the obvious eating disorders that result from having a long-standing body image and there is quite a stew of messed up emotions. Depression, anxiety, low self-esteem, irritability, and loss of sexual desire are just a few of the problems that can arise when a woman hates her body.

Try to change that.

The body you’re in today is the one that gives you all your life experiences. It’s the one that allows you to love and hug. To learn new things. To experience life. Instead of being judgmental about it, spent time looking after your body. Start practicing self-care. It might be a manicure or pedicure. Or you might start skin brushing to help rid your body of toxins and give your skin a healthy glow that comes from nothing else. Regardless of what you choose, be sure to love your body starting today.

When you do, the chances of reaching your weight and fitness goals actually improve. Good luck.

Photo Credit : Miss Summernats 2011 from Eva Rinaldi via Flickr